Lesson 5: Loving my Brethren as Christ Loved

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Lesson Overview

Daily Reading Schedule:

Thursday: Colossians 3:12-17

Friday: Ephesians 4:1-6

Saturday: Romans 14:19-23

Sunday: Matthew 5:43-48

Monday: 1 Corint hians 8:1-13

Tuesday: 1 Corinthians 6:1-11

Lead Scripture:
1 John 4:20-5:1 “If someone says, ‘I love God,’

and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? And this commandment we have from Him: that he who loves God must love his brother also. Whoever believes that Jesus is the Christ is born of God, and everyone who loves Him who begot also loves him who is begotten of Him.” The transformation of a Christian is seen in his changed mind and his changed actions. A notable change in the life of the Christian is his treatm ent of his brothers and sisters. As John wrote above this should be a natural progression of our transformation: as we love God, we love those begotten of Him. Can we claim to be like Christ when we hate those whom God loves? Love is Commanded God commands us to love our brethren. Loving my brother is not an option, nor is it a command that I can follow selectively. Although we realize that some brethren’s personalities clash with ours, or they have habits or idiosyncrasies that bother us, we must work harder to overcome these minor things to be brethren. Some have the attitude, “I have to love him but that doesn’t mean that I have to like him.” Perhaps they wish to reconcile the command to love our brethren and the reality that some brethren can be obnoxious, overbearing, insensitiv e, and annoying. How can we truly have love for our brethren if we do not make significant at tempts to overcome the natural reaction to avoid these people? Will we show true hospitali ty, help, love, and concern for someone we love but whom we make conscious efforts to avoid? A better approach is to look past character traits to the soul within. Perhaps the gentle rebuke made in sincere love coul d chisel away some undesirable characteristics to make the brother lovable to others . Certainly, there are people who grate on our nerves, but we probably grate on the nerves of others as well. Paul addresses the need to make a special e ffort to love the unlovable in Colossians 3:13: “bear with one another.” The word “bear” here is used elsewhere of G od suffering or bearing with us (Matthew 17:17, Mark 9:19). In 2 Corinthians 11:1,19, the same word is used in a sense that we might translate as put up with . There is a great need for us to suffer with, forbear, put up with, and bear with one another. We come from different backgrounds, geographical areas, financial situations, educational levels, etc. We are a di ssimilar people unified into one body under one head. It is essential that we bear with one another and not w illfully withhold our full love for some brethren because we do not “like” them. “What do you do more than others? Even the tax collectors love those who love them,” Matthew 5:46 (paraphrased)

Colossians 3:12-17

Note Paul’s lessons of brotherly love in Colossians:

“Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved” Therefore connects the previous verses: you have put on the new man and put off the old man, you were raised with Christ, and you are setting your mind on things above. You are the chos en of God (elect) according to your response to His calling through the word of the gospel, 2 Thessalonians 2:13-14. You are holy (sanctified) as God is holy, 1 Peter 1:15-16, and loved by the Father.

“put on…” Tender mercies “Bowels of mercy”(KJV); “heart of compassion” (NASB). It is translated from two Greek words that indicate the mercy and compassion that comes from deep within oneself, not just a show of mercy that is expected but not really felt. Kindness “Grace in action. It is a sweetness of disposition, a desire for the good of others.” –Robert Gromacki Humbleness of mind True humility before God and others. This, like tender mercies, is not an outward show for others but a genuine, humble spirit. Meekness Literally, strength under control. “Gentle and forbearing under ill- treatment and provocation, but firm and unyielding in devotion to right.” –David Lipscomb Longsuffering Bearing up under suffering, patient. Not easily angered. Bearing with one another (Discussed above). A toleration for others. It overlooks mannerisms, idiosyncrasies, and similar things which bother us. Forgiving one another as Christ forgave us We must live to the high standard of forgiveness that Christ has shown towards us. If we were forgiven much, we must forgive much. “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors,” Mt. 6:12. Love, the bond of perfection This love is to bind the Christians to Christ and one another, Colossians 2:2. It motivates us to change.

“And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful.” The peace of God is to “umpire” our hearts and direct our lives. When we have peace with God, it is easier to have peace with our brethren, especially those who require more longsuffering. We are unified in one body when we all are ruled by the p eace of God and seek the things which make for peace, Romans 14:19. An example of seeking peace is in 1 Corinthian s 6:1-11. I should not take my brother who has wronged me to court but rather accept the wrong rath er than disgrace the name of the Savior and the church before the world. Sometimes we have to “accept the wrong” to make for peace. It is not wrong to confront a brother for an expense re sulting from his negligence, but if he will not hear you, or the church, it is be tter to accept the wrong and le t the great Judge, our God, administer justice. Loving my Brother’s Conscience When I love my brethren as Christ loved me, I will not do anything that might cause them to stumble and be lost. To accomplish this, we must have true love for our brethren, forbearance, long-suffering, and patience developed in our lives. Though it is difficult, I may have to refrain from doing something that I know is not condemned in the presence of a brother who, because he does not have knowledge, would be offended. Consider the issue of eating meat offered to idols in 1 Corinthians 8:1-13. The issu e was not whether it wa s right to eat meat offered to idols or not; eating meat was not condemned. The real issue was that if I have a brother in Christ who does think it is wrong to eat meat of fered to idols and I, knowing this , eat meat that is offered to idols (since I know that it is not condemned), that I may encourage my brother to eat in violation of his conscience. I have used my liberty to cause my brother to stumble. It is not wrong for me to eat meat that has been offered to idols, but my br other who does not have this knowledge, if he eats, will be condemned because he has violated what he believes to be commanded by God. I must not put my brethren into that situation. Note the strong language of Paul in verse 12: “ But when you thus sin against the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ.” When doing something that is not wrong, but doing it in the wrong circumstance, I sin against my brethren and Christ. My brot her and I may be lost through my knowledge! Paul’s solution to the problem is if an action causes my weak brother to stumble, I will not do it. My brother’s conscience is more important th an food or anything else that would make him stumble. This sacrifice is a practical application of bearing with one another.

Conclusion

As I transform my life, I must ch ange my attitude towards and trea tment of my brethren. I am to look out for their soul’s salvation as well as my own. I am to bear their burdens, edify them, and dwell with them in peace. For some people this may be relatively easy but for most it will be constant work to maintain the proper attitude towards the brethren, particularly the unlovable and weak. If I want to be like Christ, and love brethren as Christ loves them, I will make it my goal to unite with them in peace in genuine love, mercy, and humility.

Questions for Discussion & Study

Since we are commanded to love our brethren, what would constitute disobedience?
What practical things can we do to develop love for the unlovely brother/sister?
What is the distinction between showing mercy and having tender mercies?
If my brother has wronged me, what steps should I take before “accepting the wrong?”
How is it possible to sin by doing something that is not forbidden?